A Southern Girl's Guide to Planning a Trip Around the World

A picture of Blakely's misspent youth.

To be read phonetically.  

Note: The entirety of this content uses phrases directly from our Southern childhoods.  It is written from the POV of a supportive, but sassy Southern lady (as if there is any other type).




This trip is a doozie and I'm proud of y'all.  But thinkin of y'all in some foreign land gets us all as nervous as cats on a tin roof and alotta folks can't make heads or tails of why y'all're leaving.  Honey, you're as stubborn as a mule so I don't need to worry about you changin' course.

Now this trip won't all be easy.  Plans'll go cattywampus just about when you're all hot and bothered.  You'll want to bless out every good-for-nothin who gives you the short end of the stick.  Don't fly off the handle or get your pretty feathers ruffled.  Just take a breath, eat somethin wholesome, have a cocktail, put on some color, and get back out there.

Sugah, now, you can't go trampin around the world in your pearls and lace.  They'll be on you quicker than a duck on a June bug.  So cover up what God gave ya and mind your manners.  That doesn't mean they won't get onto you.  But you're in their territory so you gotta respect that.  Just say "yes m'am," "no m'am," "yes sir" and "no sir."  Honey catches more flies than vinegar.

Dahlin you know I think the world of you and the babies think you hung the moon.  So have a fabulous time.  But remember who you are and who's you are.  And y'all hurry back now, ya hear?